


The Antichrist's Sing-Along Apocalypse

by blueinkedbones



Category: Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, Supernatural
Genre: Gen, M/M, archives of shame presents, flashback to 2009 you guys, the musical recap of spn s4 to the tunes of dr horrible
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-18
Updated: 2014-05-20
Packaged: 2018-01-25 09:24:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1643684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueinkedbones/pseuds/blueinkedbones
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sing along with Sam Winchester as he inadvertently causes the near-destruction of the planet!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Act 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Shadowfang44](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowfang44/gifts).



> archive of shame presents a step back in time to 2009! rose is 16, supernatural is in its fourth season, and what? sonny and cher broke up?!
> 
> as with most musical parodies, its generally more fun when you sing along, so you can open the asterisks beside the song titles in a new tab for the original music.

**Evil Sam Winchester's Totally Badass Evil Metal Intro Song of Evil[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vlq20E3SOVQ)**

 

**Sam:**

Doing stuff

Who knows what?

Having fun

With demons 

 

Important

To the plot

That I screw

_mumble(my wife)clearsthroat_

Everyone

 

With my girl inside a girl who’s dead

Don’t have an excuse

Except Dean’s death

Went to my head and

 

Underthings

On the floor

There’s a knock

On the door

 

Figure its

The pizza guy

But it’s Dean

Back for more

 

With my girl inside a thin disguise

But everybody's fooled; turns out he

Popped up yesterday

He says he’s pretty much okay

And we both hugged, I think he cried

Most of the time I lied and lied

About my Lilith-killing plan

I know that's bad but... c'mon, man

 

So he’s back

Brother dear

To supervise

Overbear

I forgot

 

_Dean: What?_

 

_Sam: ...Um... You're... so... hot? No, that's—No..._

 

**Sam:**

With my girl inside a—

 

_Sam: What I mean to say is, there's no girl. Nope._

 

_Dean: Uh-huh. Who's Kristy?_

_Sam: Who?_

 

**Hey, I Don't Remember Getting This Tramp Stamp![*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWi4wAqxQ3c)**

 

**Dean:**

I'm no hero, just a guy

Who’s back from getting beaten

To see if Sammy is okay

Plus I haven’t eaten in years

 

The thing is, something bad-ass

Had to rescue me from harm

And it’s a major issue

'Cause it went and

Left a handprint on my arm

 

Don’t know what could do it

Why I’m gettin’ second chances

I’m fine with fighting evil

But I’ll pass on the romances for now

 

So look, thanks to who got me out

Am I grateful? Sure

But it’s a bit excessive to burn handprints on my shoulder like I’m yours!

Just keep that in mind, Mr. Monster…

  

**Portrait of a SPN fanboard, 2009[* ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7X1VjGsZeyw)**

 

Newbie Ruby

Newbie Ruby

Seemed like she was a Dean girl

Last year in Season3

But now she’s got us teen girls thinking that can't be

She turns us into mean girls

Acts like a big softie

Fangirls call her “So OOC!”

Send off your hate mail to Kripke.

(She grew on me—It's true—She’s sweet!)

 

Sam’s trying to waste demons

Wants Lilith on a plate

But now that Dean's a free man he'll just have to wait

We're sure Ruby is scheming, we've justified our hate

 

Katie’s our fave

So suddenly

(Geni's marrying our JP!)

 

**The One Where I Totally Screwed Up Which Song Came Where Because I Was 16 and Wrote All This Nonsense In One Very Hyper Day[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PAn1c0MM-to)**

 

Hot new girl named Anna

She can hear the angels doing

Everything. She bonds with Dean

And they quickly get to screwing

She’s gonna die—

_No? she’s recurring?_

 

**Holy Lemmings Inc (For All Your Blindly Following Needs)[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIXJEpLOkeg)**

 

**Castiel:**

Our God sends us on what our God sends us on

Sometimes he's odd; a dickwad just like John

It's a pity but this city's desperately flawed

Our Sodom and Gomorrah, his holy murder squ—

 

**Uriel:**

Shut up, Castiel, no one asked a thing

We're here to kill humans, not take them under our wing

So let's get started now, destroy a town or ten

Before your pet can start to squawk again

 

God sends us on what our God sends us on

We'll do the job and kill the demon spawn

Turn this troubled town to

Rubble down to

Ash and sulfur core

Before the seal is broken—

Son, this is war

 

**Dean:**

This dad parallel really works so well

But I won't let you do it, so send me back to hell

I know you're in meatsuits made of ordinary folks

But here's a couple of dick jokes

 

Uriel:

_You're an abomination._

 

 **Uriel:** Our god sends us on what our god sends us on                                                                                    **Dean:** Don't you have a spine?

 

**Castiel:**

I have doubts too

 

 **Uriel:** He's the king I'm the queen and you're a pawn                                                                 **Dean:** So His moves are the same as mine

 

**Castiel:**

Emotions about you

_Oh be quiet, Uriel_

 

 **Uriel:** A pawn I'll topple to stop you going on                                                                                         **Dean:** Oh I'm completely terrified

 

**Castiel:**

Dean why don't you tell me more of your opinions

 

**Uriel:**

You're suicidal, this idle talk gets you gone

 

 **Castiel:** No, go on, prod—I'll just hand-rebuild your smoking bod **Dean:** Did you really just say that

 

 **Uriel:** Turns this troubled town to rubble down to sulfur-stinking core                  **Dean:** My stubble will survive it and much more

 

**Castiel:**

What is “that”?

 

**Uriel/Dean:**

Well now the seal is broken, so this is war

 

Cas: (finally realizing what he said, going pink)

 _God._  


	2. Act 2

**  
Confrontation![*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQyNN2SfPwQ)**

 

**Sam:**

Dean, there's nothing here to fix

I’m not just drinking demon blood for kicks

There's no time for calling names

And brothers playing silly games

Or this blame—

Look, it's the Apocalypse

 

 _Hell on Earth_ , Dean! Anything but that

Is a win, but you still

Act like I'm going dark. Don't be a brat

We’ve got Lilith to kill!

 

I cannot believe you, man

Was it done before it began?

But you know what? Fine

Born Under a Bad Sign

Has got a plan

 

**Dean:**

Are you high?

You think it's fine to lie and lie

And when I finally see you try

You act like it's something that I

Need to accept, like you know what you're doing here

It's under control

I see the signs everywhere

The blood taking its toll

 

I cannot believe you, dude

and I'm so sorry to intrude

On your perfect plan

But let me tell you, man

Not in the mood

 

 **Sam:** Dean, there's nothing I can do                                            

                                                                            **Dean:** Stay right here

 

 **Sam:**  We'll scream 'til both of us go blue                             

                                                                                                           **Dean:**  And don't you dare go anywhere

 

 **Sam:**  But it won't translate to you, in a way you'll accept as true

                                                                                                         **Dean:**  That last shot was a major scare

 

 **Sam:** And I know you are scared as hell 'cause I am too            

                                                                                                                           **Dean:**  So you have to start playing fair and let me

 

 **Sam:**  Hell on Earth, Dean! Everything you've seen                       

                                                                                                                 **Dean:**  Take control for just a couple scenes

 

 **Sam:** With nowhere left to run                                                      

                                                                                    **Dean:**  Give us space to run

 

 **Sam:**  I can stop it! Why act like that means                                  

                                                                                                                 **Dean** : From the fallout of your freaky genes

 

 **Sam** : There's nothing to be done                                                  

                                                                                                  **Dean** : And everything you've done

 

 **Sam:**  I cannot believe this, Dean                                                    

                                                                                              **Dean** : I cannot believe that bitch

 

 **Sam:**  You're determined to make this mean                                 

                                                                                                     **Dean:**  Gave you such an unholy itch

 

 **Sam:**  Ruby understands                                                                  

                                                                                          **Dean:**  That was her last scene

 

 **Sam:**  And you just make demands                                                 

                                                                                                **Dean:** Sam, you are getting clean

 

 **Sam:**  While she's my queen                                                               

                                                                                **Dean:**  And her—a ditch

 

 

 

**In Case You Were Thinking Sam's The Only Dude Dealing With Emotional Inner Conflict This Season[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqH9w5Xqqhw)**

 

Turns out Dean has a secret,

It’s painful just to tell

He’s been trying to keep it since he escaped hell

Ten years of guilty regrets that he cannot dispel

Truth is he tortured souls back then

We’ll never mention this again

 

**Too Far Gone[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TDg2iV04PU)**

 

**Dean:**

Back from hell, you might say

This is easy

But what Sam's into, well

Man, it's ma—

king me queasy

Cuz he's drunk on this rage

That I gave

Him by dying or

A so

Far gone stage

That there's no

Point in trying to

Say no,

Man, your eyes were black

 

He's just in too deep

Black blood through his veins

So i'll wean him off

Before it cooks his brain

Hate to see him like this

Hate to cause him pain

But he's in too deep

 

Bobby's not sayin' much, it's real quiet

'Til Sam's twitch—

Ing and hot to the touch

If he dies, I'll kill a bitch

Kept him safe, brought him back, fought his bullies now and then

And so when

I attack

Ruby's pull, he's mine again

But his eyes were black...

 

He's just in too deep

Too hooked on her highs

So I'll keep him close and

Never close my eyes

God can kiss my ass,

Angels in the skies,

He's just in too deep!

 

And Sammy will see the real Ruby—

In some poor

Dead girl’s re—

Cycled re-corpse

And he may cry—

He’s that kind of guy

But the tears Sammy cries’ll be teary tears of re-morse

 

He's just in too deep

And my job to fix

Over chicks or god or the apocalypse

I'll just stay right here

Won't take any trips

Till he comes back to grips

 

He's just in too deep!

 

(Castiel lets Sam out)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next, So I Keep aka the Exposition Song.


	3. Act 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All roads lead to the same destination.

**Keep On Keepin On (Exposition Song)[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOxFbQRQHSU)**

 

**Sam**

So I keep fighting the fear that somehow I’m unclean

Like Yellow Eyes just broke me from the start

 

_Sam:_

_What's his plan?_

 

**Dean**

So I keep Sammy safe and he just throws it

Back at me

 

**Cas**

So I keep up this show of such flawless faith in the face of these questions,

Where is god?

 

_Dean:_

_Where is he?_

 

**Dean:**

Hell comes when I'm dreaming

So I keep

Myself from falling asleep

But then Sammy's screaming

Makes me want to take a flying leap

 

**Sam:**

So I keep fighting to be

Something other than evil, maybe other than me

 

_Sam:_

_Is it a lie?_

 

**Uriel:**

Join me or die

There's no god here, no one to deny

Me the most one-dimensional villain role in SPN history

(Counting all seasons!)

 

**Dean:**

He's up all night scheming

Then he creeps

Away when I fall asleep

Sammy's not redeeming

My assertion that

He's in too deep

 

_Bobby:_

_How the hell'd he get out?_

 

**Dean/Sam:**

It's a war worth fighting

So I keep—

 

**Sam:**

Though I know my soul's cheap

 

**Dean/Sam:**

—Keep it up, inciting

 

 **Sam:**  Shouts of “Monster,” I'm                      **Dean:**  Blows 'til we're both

 

**Both:**

In too deep

 

**Fangirls:**

Ruby was evil, all right

We're geniuses!

 

**You Humans Are Vermin[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4lUgO-T_bAU)**

 

**Uriel:**

You might have thought I was just

Some angelic dude

The one with the

Disgusted-

By-all-humans attitude!

 

I’ve teamed up with that guy Lucy

The one locked up in the ground

And one day we’ll make you see

Why you shouldn't be around

 

You humans are vermin all around me

Every body's just a waste of space

God created us first

But we were Cain'd and cursed to watch your race…

 

You humans are vermin all around me

Ruining and spewing profanity…

 

Now I’m a missionary

Of this anti-people deal

I know that may sound scary

But I don’t care how you feel

 

See, you’ve had the world for eras

And you only screwed it up

Now it’s our turn, so you can burn

That’s basically it, yup.

 

You humans are vermin all around me

Glorified chimps living with no rules

Its time for you to die

No need to feed you lies, you stupid fools!

 

You humans are vermin all around me

Sam and Dean—and mostly Dean—so, see:

 

I’m gonna smite your faces

Don’t you dare debate me, Cas

I should shatter

Your no good grace

For going wood... soft

For some dumb piece of ass!

 

_Cas: Wood—?_

 

_Uriel: Shut up!_

 

**Uriel:**

You humans will soon be just a memory

Planet Earth unchained and vermin free

Don’t think it can’t be done

It can, and God, what fun that's sure to be!

 

You humans are vermin all around me

You humans are germs and pus and—

 

(is killed by Anna)

 

**Doubting[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K5Nx5yw5Ihc)**

 

**Castiel:**

My friend, the traitor?

Well more on that later

I cannot believe he

 

Spoke as a brother

That was just another

Way to deceive me

 

Everything played to fool me,

And every moment just

Manipulation, carefully fed, betraying trust

I'm disgusted…

Doubting…

I think I'm doubting

 

Now I can see clear

And can finally hear

What Dean’s trying to tell me

 

Are angels defying,

God watching not trying

At least to compel me

 

Shake me awake

So I'm not

Stumbling so blindly

Making mistakes

The time's not

Unwinding so kindly

And finally I'm

Doubting

Openly doubting...

Okay, so

 

Should I stay? Follow Dean? Does he know everything?

Or head back to Heaven, made to forget

And whose side am I on

In this fight's finale?

Apocalypse, coming soon

Are we there yet?

 

Do I hide? Do I fight?

Destiny can't be changed

Do I have orders here? Who do I serve?

Is God dead or missing?

Is there still hope he'll return?

Or does he just watch us burn?

Burn

 

_Cas: (panicking)_

_What do I do now? Who do I—Wh-when do I—?_

 

**Cas:**

(shaking himself back to the matter at hand)

Burn!

 

Dean is still talking

He wants to be walking

Free of heaven’s prison

 

He's the first responder

C'mon, Mr. Monster

Keep Hell's wrath unrisen

 

I think I'll listen…

 

**Destiny Can't Be Changed[*](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jZNqaAh6iLU)**

 

**Sam:**

Hunted all my life

Lost everything I ever had

They all swore I'd go bad

Now I hold the knife

 

(Destiny can't be changed)

 

Beside my wife...

 

Lilith's lying dead

Her blood pours red on my behalf

Now Ruby starts to laugh

Her power to her head

 

(Destiny can't be changed)

 

What’s that she said?

 

Dean, no, I did it!

I went and killed Lilith for good!

Like Ruby said I could…

But now the bitch admits…

 

(Destiny can't be changed)

 

Apocalypse...

Begins

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> eeeeeeeeeep


End file.
